Tuesday, July 22, 2008

When a Good Rant Goes Bad

I'm a ranter. I just am. Sometimes I try to get away from it, but I just always come back. There are days when I just need to vent in the form of a nice little rant. Tuesdays are often those days. At work, my only real female interaction comes with Brooke, my fabulous co-worker. We both work for the safety department, and she is wonderful. Anyway, she works (generally) Tuesday through Friday. Therefore, when I come to work on Tuesday, I have had three full days to build up a nice little summarized rant for her (and she does the same, it's a nice symbiotic relationship).
Anyway, as a ranter, I have grown rather adept at going over each detail of whatever it is that I'm going on about, and then moving on with life. For the most part, I am able to vent and release. It's healthy. Were I not to have such sessions, everything would remain bottled, and then I would explode, cliche, cliche, cliche... So, as I was saying, on a normal day, we are both able to share, we are able to get everything out there, and we're good. Brooke is often my safe place (that sounds awkward). What I mean by that is... if I'm frustrated with work, she totally knows what I'm talking about because she works here too; if I'm frustrated with the puppies, she understands... Well, you get the idea. She's able to let me rant without internalizing it. It's good :)
Moving on, the point of this is... today is Tuesday. So I went to her office this morning, and I began my rant. Now, among other things, this particular morning, I was talking about something that Josh had done. It wasn't anything serious, and it was really a little more funny and exasperating than anything. The thing is, though, as I was talking, all of my fears about moving (my fears that Josh isn't going to adjust, that he's not going to like it, etc... he's lived in small city Louisiana his whole life. He thinks he knows exactly what DC is going to be like, but I'm nervous that he's going to get there and it's not going to be how he thinks at all, and he's going to feel out of place, and, well, anyway, you get the idea) suddenly started colliding with my rant. Immediately, I began to get annoyed. Though Josh has not yet done anything for me to seriously get hot and bothered by, he has mentioned a couple things that he's thinking of doing before and/or after we move. Things which (I think) aren't really helpful or practical. Sometimes Josh throws around ideas of things to get that I don't think will be nearly as important or realistic once we move as they would be here where we have a good sized house, a two-car car-port, lots of land to mow, etc... ANYWAY, today, as I was venting, all of these highly unlikely scenarios came flooding into my head. I know that though Josh may talk about doing things, he really is pretty realistic, so I know we won't go through with most things that he talks about, but that did not help me.
Suddenly, I was pretty annoyed with him, for things that he hasn't even done yet. Am I the only one who does this? I was frustrated with him for making bad decisions that he hasn't made yet. I got so worked up by the possibility of him doing something that would frustrate me if he actually did it, that I finally had to stop myself, and come back to reality.
All that to say, am I the only one who does this? Does anybody else ever get annoyed by something that hasn't yet happened but could happen, and just thinking about how you would feel if it did happen is enough to get you all riled up? Maybe I'm the only one...


American Mum said...

No, you're not the only one. :) I do this sometimes too!

Debbie said...

Oh you aren't the only one. I think this is a trait that only us women have...men don't think that way. Thus we can be a tad irrational especially during a certain time of month if you catch my drift. My irritations like that don't come from my husband...they come from other members of my family. Everything will be fine when you move. I think you know that I live outside DC in Virginia. It will be an adjustment for him because the pace of life is much faster and more expensive (I'm not gonna lie) than Louisiana. But you guys are young and this is a perfect time to make a move like that. Everything will be fine...so don't fret!